The war was one because there was nobody left

The birth rate in the United States, which measures how many babies a woman is likely to have in her lifetime, has plummeted to an alarming 1.62 births per woman in 2023. This number is causing demographers and economists alike to sound the alarm bells. The consensus? We’ve got a serious problem on our hands, and this trend needs to be reversed. You can trace the causes back as far as you’d like, write all the policy papers in the world, but the fact remains: we need more babies.

Any candidate who can propose a plan to boost the birth rate—well, let’s just say we should listen. Ideally, this increase would come from stable, moral families with traditional values. But the reality is, we’ve got a long way to go. Just look at Italy: their birth rate has dropped to a shocking 1.2 per woman, meaning Italy might not even be recognizable as Italy in the near future.

Oh, and let’s not forget South Korea, where the birth rate has sunk to a jaw-dropping 0.72. At that rate, it’s only a matter of time before North Korea takes over—not by force, but by simply waiting until there’s no one left in South Korea to resist.